#I would fuck a kid up

[impossiblekittydelusion]

"Oh people change their minds all the time :)" fuck off fuck off fuck offfffff! I am telling you i do not have not will not ever want kids! This is something i have known about myself since i was twelve! Can't you fucking respect that?

[valtsv]

are we still doing this because i have a late submission

[greenglowinspooks]

Hey. Shakes you by the shoulders. DCxDP where Eobard Thawne is Danny’s cool distant “uncle” that he never sees but always sends in the coolest gifts for the holidays.

~

Danny had grown used to seeing people injured at a surprisingly young age.

He wasn’t injured on the regular, or witness to some sort of extraordinary amount of violence; his parents’ lab was just… very volatile, and they were unprofessionally lax on safety measures on the best of days.

As such, when he saw an unconscious, incredibly injured man wearing some sort of superhero suit in their backyard in the early hours of the morning (he had gotten up to get a glass of water when he heard a thump outside), he didn’t panic, as any young child should have in his situation.

No. Instead, Danny dragged the man inside (with considerable difficulty; despite how thin he was, he was heavy), treated his wounds as best he could (it’s difficult for a child younger than 10 to do stitches, you understand), put a blanket over the man, and went back to bed.

After losing a fight to the Flash and passing out in a random suburban lawn, the last thing Eobard was expecting to wake up to was a small child sitting on the floor in front of him, noisily eating a bowl of cereal.

(He had thought, maybe he would have been found by the Flash and brought to some Justice League holding cell. Or, found by a civilian, and brought to the police. Perhaps, in his feverish state, he had remembered the prison he ended up in from his time, with their brands and chemicals and torturous therapies.)

For some unknown reason, this child had found him, not recognized him as the monster he is (perhaps due to the boy’s age), and helped him—even if his healing factor would have fixed him eventually, having all his parts in the right order certainly sped up the process.

Usually he wouldn’t care for civilians. He’d killed enough that he’d lost count what felt like an eternity ago—and yet, somehow, he felt indebted to this boy. This boy, who had helped him so selflessly, who was so entirely clueless to the evil right in front of him.

This boy, who was all alone in an empty house, whose sister was away, whose parents had gone on a trip and left him behind.

(It didn’t matter the explanation the boy gave for it, Eobard’s mind whispered to itself regardless. Kin. Like calling to like.)

And so, he worked hard to free himself from this debt he had incurred.

He traveled through time, working his way into the family whilst posing as a distant relative. It was remarkably easy; the Fentons didn’t have an incredible memory of their relatives; all he had to do was forge a few papers and mention a few people and he was now “Uncle Eo”.

It was, however, taxing on the mind. These people were absurdly friendly, not to mention talkative. The effort had become a multi-year operation, popping in every now and then for large family gatherings and home visits.

It felt… nice, to be wanted for once. To be noticed in his absence for more than just his status.

To be liked.

He made sure to send the boy a gift on the right holidays, as well as on his birthdays. With his skillset, it wasn’t too difficult to follow him around and see what he liked and wanted. It also wasn’t difficult to spy in when he opened them, to ensure that he had done an acceptable job.

Of course, he couldn’t let this sort of thing cut into his time spent fighting the Flash, so he wasn’t too present. The last thing he wanted was to drag trouble into the boy’s life from his presence.

But then, it happened.

He found out that this boy, and the one known in his time as Phantom, were one and the same.

It was, as a historian, thrilling.

It was, as a villain, horrifying.

In all his travels, he had never intended to involve himself with that mysterious being which shadowed the Justice League. That ghost with the power, in some timelines, to bring about the end of all things.

Of course, he was also capable of doing that, but it isn’t exactly fun to meet someone who’s powers are a match for your own.

Especially if you couldn’t find it in yourself to end him, should he make himself your enemy.

Still, he had a debt to repay, and a boy to look after.

He delivered things to the boy’s room to help him; tactical gloves, a lightweight protective suit, weapons and equipment. All uncredited, since the boy seemed to value the idea of a secret identity.

He took it upon himself to shift the odds in his favor a few times, even; making faster-than-light adjustments to the boy and his combatants during fights to shift the odds in his favor.

Somewhere along the years, he had formed some sort of odd affection for the boy, if he was capable of doing so at all.

And so, when that ghost-boy sought his Uncle Eo out all the way in Central City, carved open and scarred, a distant look in his eyes, he took him in without a second thought.

He would protect this boy, who once had protected him.

[keferon]

…..I should be working rn but one of the songs in my playlist hit harder than usual so

[everyones-least-favorite-bard]

i have many thoughts on lee gilyoung and kim dokja but i fear i may explode if i try to articulate them fully

there is something to be said in the way kdj and orv as a whole really tends to sidestep lgy. like kdj cares about lgy of course. and orv obviously wants us to care about lgy or else they would have killed him off for shock value or fridged him way earlier than they did or something. and yet he remains in the main story but still on the sidelines

i think there is something very sad to be said about how kdj very openly tends to love on/lavish attention onto sys and like consciously acknowledge that she is, in many ways, his daughter, yet doesnt really do the same for lgy. there is something very sad to be said about the way kdj tends to refer to sys individually, but only to lgy in the collective "kids." there is something very sad in the way kdj saw himself in lgy the first time he saw him on the subway and saw him both as a boy to be saved and a tool to be used and i dont think their relationship ever really recovered from this.

like he cares about them because he doesnt want to be a shitty father-figure but hes a shitty father-figure because he cares. and while sys is saved from the brunt of this to a degree because shes a character so he can just mimic how yjh treats her in worldlines where she's saved and get by on that, lgy doesnt have that kind of support. lgy is not a fictional wunderkid or pitiable, fragile little girl (however true or false that assessment of sys is). hes a snot nosed foul mouthed violent boy obsessed with bugs and death and kdj, i think, knows he ought to care for him but he doesnt know how and doesnt bother to learn and that, i believe, the not-bothering that is, is what truly incriminates him as a shitbag father. hes afraid so he doesnt try and lgy spends 90% of orv being terrified kdj secretly hates him and the worst part is hes almost right

[channnel]

What if they were friends 🥹

[secondbeatsongs]

my boss: can you believe it? my teenage son spent all night on his chromebook again; I could barely wake him up for school!

me: oof, that sucks. what was he doing?

my boss: well the tracking thing said he was on...git...hub?

me: ...oh? that's cool! that's a site for coders; you can find some really cool projects on there! I wonder what he was up to

my boss: I'll ask my husband. he said he'd check the history

(pause while boss texts her husband)

my boss: oh. he was looking for a way to get past the tracking software...

me, internally: based!! so proud of him!! godspeed dude, I believe in you!

me, out loud: oh, uh...parenting. parenting is hard, huh?

my boss: you have no idea T_T

[piosplayhouse]

"Oh dear," the unicorn thought. "I must've really mucked up the story beyond compare! The Red Bull Luo Binghe is protecting the last unicorn scum?! Unconscionable! He should have driven me off the cliff by now!!"

[sergle]

I hope you guys like it when I talk about Hugo bc it's going to get 10x worse when I eventually get him a baby sibling

[turrondeluxe]

always happy about the fact that in 2012, mikey often asked donnie questions if he didn't understand something and donnie always answered no matter what

this can be seen in a bunch of episodes but my favorite example of it it's the one in half shell heroes where mikey is extremely excited to be in the museums and is the one actively asking donnie questions about the exhibits they saw and also actively listening to donnie's explanation (before raph got silly lmao). he was very excited to learn!!!

And while it's true that mikey would lose interest quite fast if the explanation got too lengthy with too many technical terms, it doesn't change the fact that he does retain the info donnie is always rambling on about different things!!! (even if mikey himself doesn't notice he's doing it lol) and also i find it very sweet that no matter if donnie himself got annoyed, donnie would always answer the questions. no matter what. he would always try to explain if he didn't understand something

This is prob because mikey is the one brother who is often seeking out donnie to pass time around him Meaning that donnie might have used mikey as his rubber ducky whenever mikey hangs out with him while he's working (explained him a lot of his experiments and theories while trying to solve them himself and in this way mikey also learnt in the process WHILE spending time with his brother! win win!)

it also helps donnie because accompanies him while not letting him get lonely in his lab 24/7, sometimes explaining things to someone makes it better to understand it yourself AND it's shown in the comics that donnie is quite used to his brothers just Living as background noise and literally cannot function without it lmao

They are literally the two smart kids in the family even if none of them notice it and it's all because mikey looks up to his brother and is like an sponge with donnie around. donnie is actively teaching mikey and mikey is learning! even if they have no idea they are doing it

[queenie-ofthe-void]

Playing with the idea of Steve giving Mike, Lucas, and Dustin a heads up about Eddie before they start their freshman year. About how it's in their best interest to join Eddie's friends, called Hellfire. He hypes Eddie up: how he loves DnD, sounds smart like they are when he gives his super annoying speeches. He's really into music and movies and he's got a van, maybe he'll take them to the arcade.

So now it's Eddie's first day of his third senior year, he's sitting in his normal spot in the caf with the boys, when he's bombarded with three freshman he's never seen before. They're excited to meet him. Can't stop talking about how they've heard he's cool "but in a freak way, like us", how he's so smart and funny, loves DnD. Great at sticking up for the little guy and will be able to protect them

He can't help preening a bit. Normally he's got to save the new needs himself, but apparently his reputation proceeds him. By the time they settle down, he's blushing under the weight of their praises. Definitely something he's not used to, even from his friends, to hear an entire list of reasons why he's apparently so cool.

"So, my young padawans, who spoke so highly of your new Dungeon Master?"

"Steve," Lucas replies, bouncing with excitement.

Confused, Eddie looks between the three of them. "Uhhh, Steve who?"

The curly-headed one scoffs, rolling his eyes. Pretty bitchy for a freshman, Eddie thinks. Kid's got an attitude problem.

"Steve Harrington. What, like you guys don't know him?"

Only the sounds of the cafeteria pierce the tense silence around Hellfire table. Eddie thinks he should check the guys' reactions, but he's honestly so stunned he can't force himself to move.

"Yeah, we do know him," Jeff says. "He's and asshole."

"He's not an asshole, he's awesome," Dustin screeches.

The boys continue to bicker back and forth, but they still make space for the freshies.

Eddie's got a million questions, but one more than the rest.

Does Steve Harrington think I'm cool??

~~~

Wrote a follow up fic!

[shower-phantom-ideas]

Bruh emotional support ghost kid? Well thats what they are calling him

Suicide cases in gothem are about to fucking plummet boiz cause this one weird blue eyes, black haired boy is now heading to your location.

How does he know where to be? Having a bad day and are all alone? No the fuck your not cause don’t turn around now but theres some shiny blue eyes coming at you from that dark ally. Oh shit hes here to drop some information about you and your lost loved ones that he should know. Oh god the closure. How could you have been afraid on this sweet, creepy, boy who just helped you find your way.

Meanwhile Danny is chillin in Gothem cause the GIW hate it there (none of they equipment actually functions in Gothem so it’s either super haunted or actually not haunted at all). Then all of a sudden he gets approached by a random ghost begging for his help because their sweet baby girl is about to do something horrible. Oops now all the ghosts are following their most loved ones around just to make sure they are there to rush to Danny for help when all else fails. Now hes getting to fulfil his protection obsession double time because one hes helping protect people from themselves and two hes protecting everyone in Gothem by stopping people from becoming villains for revenge. Plus he gets to see first hand how hes making a difference because all those people he saved are sending him some good vibes from all across Gothem.

Thank god he followed Jazz around so much to slightly absorb some of her phycology knowledge over the years. Plus it was actually pretty interesting so she gave him her old text books. Shes also helping him deal with the rare events where he can’t save someone. Just a moment too late or he stops them but they later succeeded in the hospital. Neither are his fault. Now only if he could convince his core of that.

Anyway why Gothem you ask? Amity Park would have been just as good tbh but imagine Batmans face when he finally gets to be face to face with the emotional support ghost boy. Why is he here? Bruce is fine. Batman is fine. Hes not gonna do anything crazy. It’s just a hard time of year. Around their death always gives him grief. But hes an adult and can manage it.

“You know they are so proud of you.” The boy states. As if it’s clear as day, even though it’s Gothem and never a clear day. Batman blinks at him, stunned for a moment. “What?” This boy can’t possibly know that. No one will ever know that, Bruce can only hope. “They see their home, full of such life. That big house that felt so empty, so cold, to them as well for years. Then you filled it with Family and Love like they had always wanted for you. They are so proud of what you have turned it into. Somewhere full of life and warmth.” A small smile graces his face as finally “you have made your parents so proud” and its all he can do to contain himself. Emotions are running high and sue him because he really did need to hear that ok. The boy suddenly looks to Bruces right with a confused face “aren’t all basements like that though?” Before Bruce can even get a word in hes gone. Just vanished before his eyes.

[godofstory]

Now it's Daeron's turn to keep up the "simping uncle" tradition

[peace-hunter]

tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.

he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.

except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.

and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.

or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)

they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.

and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.

optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.

and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.

[mustangphobia]

the wokest psychic ever. purple hair and they them pronouns

[moonlightcycle571]

More on Lanterns and Marvel

See original post here: https://www.tumblr.com/moonlightcycle571/765612915343704064/lantern-corps-and-a-10-year-old-child-in-a-last

I talked about the Lantern list (a ranking of people who to this day refuse lantern offers) and having Billy Batson be number 1, and have Captain Marvel be number 2.

This would naturally attract the attention of Lantern Cores everywhere (like what do you mean they received offers from multiple lanterns multiple times), the space community (why does the Terra City of Fawcette have dominating spots) as well as the JL (Cap, why are you outclassed by a civilian from your own city).

I also fully believe Lois Lane is on the same boat as Billy Batson when it comes to Lantern offers. One does not jump off buildings or sneak into war zones without a great deal of will power and induce a great deal of fear. Lois Lane is definitely in the top 10.

Coincidentally, in the top 50, you will find Cat Grant, Vic Sage and surprisingly Vicki Vale (if she can make BATMAN shudder and be wary of her, she can make anyone fear her).

So it’s been accepted that journalists have a lot of will power, a lot of rage and can put the fear of god into you. Clark is not bitter that he’s not on the list, no sire. Never mind that Jimmy Olsen is in the Top 100.

Batman might want to study this phenomenon.

But anyways. One does not stay at the top without ridiculous numbers. As the only top 10 ers on earth, they have grown used to random rings trying to get them on space politics quests or whatnot.

So now imagine this: Lois Lane and Billy collab on a project. While they are speaking, random rings start to show up. Instinctively, both swat them away like flies while maintaining eye contact. They don’t realise what they are doing. Clark is having an aneurism.

At some point, they both realise that the other is swatting the rings away with the same nonchalance as the other. They immediately understand what’s up. The shit eating grin they both had made a bunch of yellow rings swarm around them.

Billy gets asked on why he doesn’t want to join the Green lanterns? Billy says it’s because he hates cops. Lois nods.

Hal cries himself to sleep that night.

Bonus:

Batman stalking a civilian named Batson who for some reason is number one in the Lanterns List, with an alarming amount of yellows.

Batman finds a black hair, blue eyes, orphan child.

Batman: Alfred call the guy

Bonus 2:

Nightwing, trying to meet his future maybe brother: Hi 👋

Billy, sees an authority figure in Blue that wields batons and electricity: …

Billy immediately kicks Nightwing while yelling ACAB

Billy runs away

Nightwing cries himself to sleep that night.